Stuck
Those of us who feel like we cannot work unless we are interested in something or are fueled by some impending deadline, can simply feel stuck.
We can neither fake interest, nor can we fake deadlines.
So, what do we do?
Unfortunately, feelings of helplessness can creep in, as we cannot help ourselves. Important matters feel impossible to get to. Even enjoyable endeavors can sit there while motivation to do anything wanes.
Shame, guilt, anger and the like often follow.
And when we cannot help ourselves, we often grow afraid.
Leveraging Fear
Sometimes fear seems to give us a way out. We might even indulge it, feeling that fear is the only thing that works to get us into action.
You might even praise it,
“That’s when I do best, when my back is up against the wall!”
Troubles of Fear
Maybe that has been the way you’ve done best. But I’m certain it has not been pleasant.
Further, fear is wildly unpredictable. While it can sometimes motivate, it can just as easily paralyze. Not to mention, it can grow and gang up on us from numerous directions.
Or we might even find a thrill of engagement, forced as we were into it. We might ride that fear-of-never-returning-if-we-stop-now and even complete the work. But as all things do, our momentum fades as we collapse into an exhaustion, spent and unable to move forward.
We might fear that were we to start, we might lock ourselves in and lose track of time and the world. Perhaps yet again, we’d miss something important and disappoint the ones we love.
As an example, you have something at 2pm, and its 10am now, and you can’t do a thing.
We might fear that if we do not do all the work in a single run, that we would lose whatever muse or flow we are in, never to return. We must therefore either enslave ourselves to the work or leave yet another project incomplete. We then become increasingly afraid of these growing markers of shame, spilling over from every once flat surface in the house.
These fears can certainly become more complex, embedding themselves deeper into our projects, days, and psyche.
Maybe we do not believe that we can be the best at something and therefore decide not to start for fear of revealing our inadequacies.
Maybe we fear that if we try to do something, our sense of weakness might be on display.
And all of these can easily meld together into yet another bout of “I don’t feel like it”.
Whether someone else tells us or we tell ourselves to “just start”, it doesn’t work. Shoving ourselves through one fear after the next, leaves our sense of agency raw.
So we wait for the fear of the next deadline to overwhelm whatever other feelings we might have to kick us into gear, to get us moving again, past the exhaustion and weight of whatever has caused us to collapse last.
“Where’s the next deadline!”
The chronic, toxic cycle of fight-or-flight and exhaustion continues.
Consider a Visit-Based Approach
Consider instead, a visit-based method to approaching work, rather than one that relies on force and fear. A visit-based method is much more conducive to engaging our selves and surroundings, leveraging our innate curiosity and intelligence. The Waves of Focus Methodology teaches a unique Visit-Based method to learning and approaching both work and play.
– Kourosh
PS If you haven’t already done so, consider [Your First Step to Breaking Free from Force-Based Work (Free PDF)](https://wavesoffocus.com/Your-First-Step-to-Breaking-Free-from-Force-Based%20Work/).
