Dropping things, losing things, forgetting things, …
“I’ll do it later…”
“Why can’t I just do the thing?
Many of us wrestle with a wandering mind—a mind that feels magnified in the present moment but struggles to connect with the broader flow of time.
What Is a Wandering Mind?
Imagine looking through a magnifying lens. At its center, everything is vivid and detailed, but the edges blur into obscurity. A wandering mind works similarly—not in space, but in awareness. It amplifies the Now, making it rich and intense, while the Not Now—future plans, past commitments, meanings outside of current awareness—fades into a distant haze.
This heightened focus can be both a gift and a challenge. On one hand, it allows for deep engagement and creativity; on the other hand, it can make navigating daily life feel overwhelming.
The Two Forms of Time: Now and Not Now
A common joke within ADHD circles is that there are only two forms of time: Now and Not Now. While humorous, this insight captures a deep truth about how many of us experience time. The Now is vivid and urgent, demanding our attention. Meanwhile, the Not Now—whether it’s next week’s deadline or tomorrow’s grocery list—feels almost mythical.
To navigate this dynamic, we need tools that honor the intensity of the Now while gently bridging it to the Not Now. One such tool is what I call a Visit.
Visits: A Gentle Approach to Focus
- Choose a focus: Identify what you want to engage with.
- Be with that focus: Show up fully for even a brief moment.
- Preferably, set distractions aside: Create an environment that supports your attention.
- Stay for at least one deep breath: Ground yourself in the present.
- Optionally nudge forward: Take a small step if it feels right.
- Leave at any time: Consider when you might make a next Visit if it makes sense.
A Visit can be as short as one breath or extend into deeper work—it’s entirely up to you. The key is to be there, to fully engage your present sense of agency. Doing so helps you approach your tasks with curiosity and kindness rather than force or pressure.
Why Visits Work
- They release dependency on rigid deadlines.
- They allow you to organize work in ways that honor your unique rhythms.
- They transform overwhelming tasks into approachable moments.
A Path Forward
Over the coming newsletters, I’ll share more of the Wandering Mind’s story.
Meanwhile, consider starting small: Choose one task today and approach it as a Visit. Take one deep breath, show up gently, and see where it leads you.
- Kourosh
PS: Years ago, I began writing about this concept in my series “Letters of a Wandering Mind.” This newsletter revisits those ideas through the lens of my recent work on Waves of Focus: Guiding a Wandering Mind. Stay tuned for more…
